okay, this really is the last birthday post

I forgot to post anything about our gift for Liam: a big boy bike! (Hurray for the $20 Craigslist find) He also has a new helmet, which, of course, he is not wearing in this picture. He is still learning how to work the pedals and was glad for a helping hand from Grammie. I am sure it won't be long until he is zooming around on it. The weather has been cold and wet for the past week so he hasn't had much more opportunity to practice. Ther will be plenty of time for that in the coming months.

steak n' shake

After our day at the zoo, we went to Steak n' Shake for lunch. Liam had mini corn dogs, which he wnated me to crack open like an egg so he could pull out the hot dog bits to eat. He left the cornbread shell on his plate... And after our burgers and fries, we split a shake. There's nothing this boy eats better than sweets. Especially if it involves ice cream.

Good to the last drop.

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And that concludes these most-belated birthday posts.

Molly and Andres left this morning, and we are so so sad to see them go. I am working on some housekeeping, Liam is working on some meltdowns, and River is cutting in his two front teeth. Fun!

I have more pictures from the past week to share: a miserably cold camping trip, a day at the pool, and more.

But first, I have to run a load of laundry and figure out what to make for dinner tonight...

the birthday zoo trip

For Liam's birthday a week ago, we spent the day at the zoo in Tulsa. Don't let my shorts-clad legs fool you. The day was colder than expected, quite windy, and threatened of rain, but we still had a great time seeing all of Liam's favorites. It was fun to watch Liam showing his zoo off to everyone else. He excitedly took us from the monkeys to the snow owl, from the petting zoo to the rain forest, and, last stop, to the train. But no animals can compete with extra special birthday attention from Tio Andres and Tia Molly.

They can do really cool circus tricks.

And sometimes they are just funny.

But they are always good for snuggling.

River was glad for all of the extra Grammie time, especially on the train. Growl! (River's-I'm-so-happy-I-can't-contain-myself-sound).

Not only did we get to have Grammie, Tia Molly, and Tio Andres for our day at the zoo, Daddy came too. Now that's a special zoo trip!

With Gabriel at his side, Liam was feeling brave enough to get close to the geese. He wanted to touch them, but the geese didn't share his new-found boldness.

A special day at the zoo for an extra special birthday boy. He loved it. Clearly!

goat love

Now that Liam is over his fear of goats, we can't have a zoo day without spending some time with these furry favorites.

My mom says she likes goats better with their eyes shut so she doesn't have to see their beady eyes bulge out.
River and I love them, beady eyes and all. Especially this cute little fellow.

And this goat was kind enough to pose for some photos. Relaxing with Tio Andres.

Smirking for a glamour shot.

And sitting in on the rare family photo op.

We love goats!

three

Today, Liam is three.

Sometimes he is still that tiny baby, just born, wide-eyed in my arms and me wide-eyed with wonder at him. Other times, it feels like he has always been a part of our family. Imagining life before him almost seems more an act of imagaintion than one of remembering.

And in all of my wondering at who this little person was going to be, I could never have thought up this kid.

Every day is a new challenge. He is teaching me to expect the unexpected, to enjoy the small moments that make the awful ones worth it, and to just relax about all of the small stuff. Mess is never optional, it's just a given. And if it involves mud, even better.

And in those many moments throughout the day when I want to pull my hair out, imagining how his energy and passion for life will make him a creative, industrious, and exuberant person, I know it will all be okay.

In fact, it already is all okay. Mud, wet pants, and all.

I am so glad to have this little stinker in my life.

So I made him a skunk hat, and he loves it.

Happy Birthday, Liam.

the cake

A few weeks ago, I started asking Liam what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday party. At first he said he wanted a cake that looked like his friend Simone (so sweet...), and then he decided that he wanted a truck cake. More specifically, a scooping cake (construction trucks).

I found a few cake pans on Amazon ad showed them to Liam. He took a look at the dump truck cake and then the tractor cake, and gave me a very emphatic No.

So then we googled construction-themed birthday cakes and found something more agreeable.

Something like this:
Molly and I stayed up late with my mom the night before the party to finish the cake. We had a lot of laughs over the "dirt pile" behind the trucks on top.

After singing Happy Birthday and Liam spit/blew out all three candles, each of the kids took a truck to lick clean. (The trucks are from a Melissa and Doug puzzle purchased new for his cake...).

After licking the trucks clean, they moved on to the cake: 1, 2, 3, 4 Cake from Alice Water's Art of Simple Food with Chocolate Sour Cream Frosting from Martha Stewart's Cupcakes. Yum!

River liked his bites of cake chased down with some licks of the lollipop.

Intent on their sweets...

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So that's it for the party posts! It was a fun fun fun time. Thanks, friends, for making Liam's day so special.

piñatas: an introduction

Molly and Andres brought a piñata from Florida for Liam's party.

They watched piñata videos on YouTube with Liam so he would know what to do. It worked: Watching all of the kids experience a piñata for the first time was a lot of fun. Some were a little more enthusiastic than others.

River just wanted to pull on the streamers.

Beating the piñata with a stick suddenly became so much more exciting when all of the candy came to the floor (Tio Andres had to help break it out...).
The kids were a bit timid with the piñata this year, but I have a feeling next year will be a little different...

more party fun

Planning a party for a three year old is more about planning plenty of space for play, and not so much about planned games or activities. At least, that's how Liam's party went, and the kids all seemed to have fun.

The table in the living room had lots of homemade play dough with cookie cutters, rolling pins cut from a long dowel, and the all-important "sharp" butter knives.Throw in some punching balloons, and just let them play. It wasn't long before kids were circling the house on the scoot bike, going outside to see the chickens, and making good use of the toys.

But the best part of the day was spending time with loved ones. From favorite friends...

to favorite Tias and Tios.

Plenty of snuggles with Grammie, too. Mom, you look gorgeous!

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Tia Molly and Tio Andres have been here since Thursday. They used their super circus muscles to stir together the play dough Friday night.We are loving having them here with us for 2 weeks!!! That's like a lifetime with this traveling duo. We are so glad to have them here. Thanks for all of your help, Sister.

party time!

Yesterday morning, we celebrated Liam's birthday with friends, family, and lots of fun.

It was great to see how much he enjoyed his special day, and to watch how excited he was to share it with his favorite people.

He had a blast!

It wouldn't be his day without his birthday crown. He wore it for his 1st and 2nd birthdays, but I think I'll need to extend the back length to squeeze it on for next year...

I'm not sure how we managed to get this group of almost 1, 1, 2, 3, and 4 year olds holding still together. Here they are for a moment's rest in all of their sugar-crazed glory.

a visit with the hematologist

Yesterday,Gabriel and I took River down to Children's Hospital in Little Rock to meet with his hematologist, Dr. Stine.

This was our second encounter with the LRCH campus, and I was just as impressed with the hematologist and his staff as I was with River's urology appointment last fall.

The nurses are friendly, knowledgeable, and just good at getting the job done quickly without leaving the impression that they are rushing. And Dr. Stine was awesome. He spent a lot of time listening to my concerns and sorting through all of River's medical quirks, and he was able to give us more information on River's vWD as well as a better idea as to how this is going to affect his life.

For the everyday scheme of things, River can lead a normal, healthy life. He is sure to have more visible bumps and bruises, especially during the toddler years, and we should expect nosebleeds from time to time and bleeding from his gums when he is teething.

Of more concern is anytime that he gets a significant injury or needs to have surgery. In blood that functions properly, the von Willebrand proteins act like ropes to anchor the platelets over wounded tissue. Since River has a deficiency of these proteins, his blood attempts to form clots, but is unable to secure them properly.

This disease is not curable, but it is treatable. There are medications that he can take. Until he's two, the only ones available have to be given through an IV. After his second birthday, there is also a nasal spray that he can use when he gets injured. Since he'll only be 18 moths when he has surgery in September, what is normally an outpatient surgery will now involve at least an overnight stay so he can receive the medication before and after the surgery.

Dr. Stine ordered additional lab work to determine exactly which type of vWD disease River actually has, but he seemed confident that River has Type 1, the least severe of the three. We should get those results in the next 2-3 weeks.

Having to hold River for yet another blood sample was difficult. He screamed and cried, wanting me to make the nurse stop. That was really not fun, but at least this nurse allowed me to hold him on my lap while she worked on him. Once it was over, River was back to his happy self.

Aside from the blood sample, River seemed perfectly at ease with everything. He evn crawled over to Dr. Stine, pulled up on his legs, and lifted his arms up for the doctor to hold him. Dr. Stine bounced him on his knee, made googly faces at him, and let River pull on his lips. I wanted to pull out my camera, but thought that might be a little weird...

I couldn't resist a few shots of his diapered bottom poking out of the gown.


We left the appointment with a stack of informational pamphlets, a medical i.d. bracelet application, and a number for the blood disorders specialty nurse, Lakeisha, with instructions to call or e-mail her with any concerns or questions.

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I am still processing it all. In a lot of ways, it feels like an overload: the information, the emotions.

I know that for the most part, he is fine. This is something that he can live with. But that's what continues to hit me the hardest: He is going to have to live with it. And so am I. There is a lot of worry. A lot of fear.

At the Ash Wedneday service last week, we took River up to the front with us for the impositon of the ashes. Father Stan marked my forehead, and then asked if I wanted him to do River's too. I nodded, thinking Sure, why not, but after we were back in our seats and I sat there reflecting, watching River with the ashes smudged over the bruises on his forehead, I knew in that moment that one day he will die. Just like I will. And everyone else. Death is inevitable. And instead of freaking me out, that thought was a comfort.

No matter how much I worry and fret over him, I can't protect him from everything. And that's okay. At least, I am trying to be okay with it.

discoveries

Today was a day for trying something new:

flatbreads on the grill are really great

Liam can do the big slide all by himself.
River likes hummus.

River likes mud.

goose eggs

Between the two of them, Liam and River now have 6 goose-egg bumps on their heads. Liam's are all hidden underneath his hair, but the three on River's forehead show up nice and bright thanks to his vWD.

I'm not sure how we made it until last week before Liam got his first real lump on the head. He fell off his step stool while helping me in the kitchen and landed with his head on the tile floor. The fall wasn't alarming so much as the immediate bump that appeared on the back side of his head, as if a small plum was sitting underneath his scalp.

In a panic, I called my mother-in-law and she assured me that he was fine if his only symptom was the bump. But the real cause for panic, she continues to remind me, is that inevitable first trip to the ER someday in our future. Because with boys, these things just happen.

I am glad that day isn't here yet.

In the meantime, we're treating these black-and-blues with lots of hugs and kisses.

poop-eating and other mishaps

Yes, you read that right. I said poop-eating, and I wasn't referring to our beagle's fondness for the treats in the cat box...

We have been having some major potty-untraining issues with Liam for the past few weeks. He has been fully potty trained for nearly a year now, but he has recently decided that he would rather pee in his pants and suffer the consequences rather than go on the toilet.

He knows his body's cues. He knows how to use the toilet by himself. He just doesn't want to do it. There are even times when he will tell me that he needs to go pee, he'll refuse to walk to the toilet, and he'll smirk at me as he wets himself. And nearly every car ride recently has ended with a wet car seat and a look of impish satisfaction on Liam's face.

While I think that jealousy over the attention I give to River factors into this equation, Liam's behavior has more to do with the power struggle, because with Liam, it's always about the power struggle.

Rather than make an issue over the whole situtation (tried that...didn't work), I am taking the control away from Liam by putting him back in diapers. I give him one chance each day, dressing him in underpants and reminding him that if he wets his pants, he'll get a spanking and a diaper, and every day that's just what happens. Putting a fully-potty-trained almost 3 year old back in diapers is not exactly my idea of a solution, but I am at a loss when it comes to any other options.

So apparently this morning, Liam pooped on the floor in his room and then came out to the living room to inform me that River was eating it.

Uh-huh. I ran into the room and found River, clutching a handful of it with smears across his face. Gag!

Like I said, I am at a loss.

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Speaking of mishaps, I made some divine lemon curd over the weekend and throughly ruined it when the tarts refused to come out of the baking pan.

Not my finest cooking moment.
Gabriel and I have been eating them out of the pan with a spoon.

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As rotten as Liam can be at times, there are still those little moments that make everything okay. Yesterday, he insisted on washing Gabriel's hair in the sink after a haircut. He was so gentle and thorough, completely absorbed with his job.

Moments like these make the rest a bit easier to get through. Just a bit.